Have you ever wanted something and found out that your mind is your biggest obstacle? Like it’s your enemy instead of your friend?
Well in this video I’m going to explain to you how our mind works how our brain works and how we can use it as an ally instead of an enemy.
Maybe you want to work on a project and you’re really motivated, but as soon as you want to start your mind goes “no don’t want to do it, go and watch Netflix”, for example. So I’m going to explain to you what I’ve learned about the mind, how it works and how to use it properly. And all these techniques, I’m learning them from a training that I’m currently following, it’s a training from Marisa Pier, the famous therapist.
As I said I’m passionate about how the mind works and I want to use it to help people overcome their challenges and remove any blockages.
1. Pain and Pleasure associations
So, let’s dive in. So the first thing to know about the mind, and this point alone can be really effective in changing your behavior and in understanding how to use your mind. The only thing that your mind does is it keeps you away from pain. So if you take a look you will see that all of your actions are related to either pain or pleasure.
Indeed when you do something, it’s either to gain pleasure or to avoid pain, so it all comes down to the meaning you attach to the activity, to your behavior. Let’s say you want to start exercising and you’ve been procrastinating, you’ve been postponing it. The reason why you’ve been postponing it is because when you think about exercising, it’s painful, you know it will be hard. And the minute you will start to exercise and actually do it is because it’s too painful not to do it.
Let’s take another example. Let’s say you have an important project to work on, you know you have to do it. Have you ever wondered why we always at shcool waited like two days before the deadline before starting the work? Because when you have one month to do something, the first days it’s just too painful to get to work because you know you still have time but by approaching the end you know that if you don’t get to work it will have worse consequences and then you start to work. So it’s all about pain and pleasure and by knowing this the very powerful thing is that you can change things, you can change the meaning you attach to things.
For example, let’s say you’re on a diet and you want to stop eating sugar. It’s very hard because usually what goes on is “Oh, I love ice cream or I love chocolate” of course your brain is going to make you want it because it gives you pleasure. But then you eat the chocolate or you eat the pizza and right after you feel bad because you just ate something that’s not good for your body.
So what you could do is link pain to eating pizza or eating chocolate and link pleasure to not eating it. For example, every time you want to eat chocolate or pizza you can picture yourself like being really fat not fit not able to do exercise and you can see that by refusing the chocolate or the pizza or whatever it is, link pleasure to this by thinking: Yeah, I will be able to fit my clothes. I will be able to exercise, I will be able to look good in my clothes; so it’s all a matter of attaching a different meaning to it.
Have you ever experienced like really wanting to do something and instead of doing it just lie on the couch or take a nap? If yes let me know by commenting below I would really like to know, because we are the same we’ve all been there!
2. Your Mind Does What It Thinks You Want It To Do
The second point is about how your mind works and it’s not about making you miserable because all that your mind wants to do is to make you survive and make you happy. Your mind doesn’t say “okay. He wants to be fit. So let’s make him eat pizza!”. No, if you’re eating pizza it’s because you’ve told your mind that you really like it. What you tell your mind is what your mind does.
Let me give you an example of why your mind does exactly what it thinks you want it to do. The story is about a woman that couldn’t have children because she didn’t have her periods. And what she discovered is that when she was a child she was having really bad periods, like very painful ones, to the point where she couldn’t go out when having the periods because the pain was so intense. She couldn’t be around people and so she started to tell herself “I don’t want these periods, these periods are so horrible”. “It’s hurting me so bad I don’t want them”, and she kept saying that to herself over and over again every time she had her periods.
Eventually, her periods were gone. So this is the power of the mind over the body, but several years later she wanted to have children and that became a problem because she needed her periods back to be able to ovulate and to have children. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t have her periods because her mind believed that periods were bad. When she was saying “Okay, I need my periods back” her mind said “no, you don’t! You hate those remember?” So the whole point is understanding that your mind does what it thinks you want what it thinks is in your best interest, it’s trying to protect you. It’s trying to move you away from pain remember?
So what it means is you have to dialogue with it very consciously and tell it exactly what want, for example if you want to lose weight, let’s take back the example of the pizza and salad. Lets say you’re going to a restaurant and you’re looking at the menu and you’re looking at all the pizza and all the fatty foods and you’re saying “Oh, there’s pizza, but I have to eat a salad” and then your mind will go: “No, you don’t you love pizza remember? It makes you feel good!”. Because it thinks it’s in your best interest, so if you say “no no no, I will have the salad” then you eat the salad and then you feel frustrated and it goes the same if you choose to eat the pizza you would be frustrated after. So what you have to do is telling your mind exactly what you want. Just say “No. I could have the pizza but I’m choosing to have the salad because it’s actually good for me” and your mind will go: “Oh, okay. You’re choosing it so there is no reason I’m giving you any resistance against it because it’s what you’re choosing”. It’s what’s in your best interest.
By explaining that I’m choosing to eat the salad to be able to fit in my clothes and to see the same weight on the scale, your mind will go”Yeah Sure do it!” and the same goes for exercising.
My own experience with it was that I wanted to exercise and make it a habit but I started and stopped at least five times. And I started one last time and up to this day I never stopped and it was because at the beginning I was saying things like “I need to work out”. “I need to do some exercise”. But the voice in the back of my head was “I don’t really want tp, I’d prefer to lie on my bed or watch TV”. But when I started to change and to explain, “okay, I may not enjoy it right now, but my body will love it, it would be good for me” and by actually saying over and over, “I like it, I need it, I enjoy it” and explaining my mind that I really need it and I want it, now my mind lets me do it and even pushes me to do it. So that’s the magic!
OkaySo if I have to sum up just remember that your mind does what it thinks you want it to do and it’s only based on pain and pleasure. If you remember those two things you can choose to do whatever you want.
So now you understand how to use your mind efficiently and in a way that empowers you because really the mind is a tool. It’s not you versus your mind. It’s you who can use your mind. We are all able to use this amazing tool. So go ahead and do it!
I hope you guys really got some value from this video because this principle really helped me to achieve what I want so if you like the video please tell me by liking, subscribing to my channel and letting me know in the comments below!
Thank you for your time with me!